Having just watched this episode on demand, I’m going off what is fresh in my mind– not off written notes because I was too busy eating. So, don’t mind my skipping around too much. It’s the main points that count, right?
Martha Stewart, Back Off
So let’s start of with Yolands in her kitchen making something not only yummy, but also very pretty looking. Her friend Suzanne Somers stops by, along with Kyle and Lisa. So random. Anyway, they enjoy some food in Yolands ‘s awesome backyard and Suzanne talks about what it takes to live forever. A bunch of pills zip-locked in a freezer bag apparently. Suzanne says you need to have a good sex life, and Lisa says, “Oh really? Oh no.” Or something along those lines. You know, it’s her typical ‘I hate having sex but do I really? hmmm bad, girl’ routine that is kindaaaaaa getting old.
But it was a wonderful time. Cheers, cheers, cheers.
Because I am on a Faye boycott and refuse to talk about scenes her face seems to butt into, I’m going to skip over Kyle’s daughter’s 6th grade graduation party. Adrienne and Paul show up, Kyle says a nice speech, but that’s all I got to say.
A Nose Doctor Knows About the Nose
Now we move onto Kim. Every time I see her, I seriously go, “Oh yeah! Kim’s a housewife.” It’s just so easy to forget. Anyway, she’s always looking at something or talking about her kids with the hired help and this is no different. While she is going over photos of her kids at younger ages, she says she wants a nose job……….what? Her nose is perfectly fine. Never did I once look at her and think, “Geez, that nose.” That is so random. But apparently she asked a plastic surgeon if she should get any face lifts and he flattered her by saying no. But the nose, he could do.
Getting Ready for Vegas!
Brandi has a friend, Adrienne, over…not that Adrienne..another. And they are trying to figure out what Brandi should pack for Vegas since she is doing that party-with-Brandi gig. I remember her calling it some kind of school, but I don’t know. She also practices pole dancing in a scene…and doesn’t seem too bad at it. Like, at all.
Then we move to Marisa’s house. So is she a housewife? Is she not? Is she an honorary friend? Looks like she’s taking a bigger role because she will be going to Vegas. So Marisa, half-assed up do, a few too many accessories, and bra straps sticking out of a racer back (those strap perfects are available at Walgreens for like 5 bucks!), argues with her mom about what is cute and what isn’t. Everything I just mentioned: isn’t.
Lisa is also packing and Ken says she doesn’t need pole dancing lessons. Aw.
When a Man Loves a Woman
We move onto Yolands, again in her kitchen, and again making an amazing meal! Damn, I want to be her. She talks about how it’ so easy to cheat and men are simple. You feed them, you make them feel loved, you pat them on the head, you take them on walks, you rub their bellies. Very simple. And that’s why she and David work so well. She makes him feel like a man. And damn is she an amazing woman. Anyway, they fawn over their perfect view and each other.
The girls are in Vegas and having a blast at dinner! They rip on LeAnn which I love. LeAnn sucks. And Kyle says she cannot imagine being pregnant and having your husband leave you and cheat on you. She doesn’t know what she would do. I don’t know what I would do. I don’t think many of us would even know where to begin!
Brandi makes Kyle eat an oyster. I was frustrated with Kyle’s response (she hated it) because gosh I love seafood and I would love to eat seafood in Vegas. But whatever. Brandi tells Marisa that she felt bad for Dean and Marisa brushes it off, like “we have a playful-banter relationship. He’s a good man and I’m very lucky.” Where are the tears, dammit? Just kidding, but not really.
So the girls have more fun and bond.
Kim goes to a surgeon to ask about her nose. And the girls do some warm up stripper routine thing.
Anticipation for Next Week
But what is even more exciting to me is the previews! Camille is on a mission! The girls are shown at dinner and Yolands has joined them. Camille yells at Yolands about something and then turns to Lisa and says, “You don’t own SUR.” I should really stop putting quotes around things I am paraphrasing. But she says something like that and Lisa is all, “Uh yes, I do, bitch.” Paraphrasing, but you know.
So I can’t help but wonder what has Camille’s panties all in a bunch and whether Season 1 Camille is back for some fun. Because really, we all love nice-nice Camille. But who doesn’t want to see a little bit of Season 1 come out?
I’m glad the girls are all giggling and having fun this week, because they sure ain’t next week. And um, where’s TayTay? With her lawyer boyfriend maybayyyy?